Stephen Colbert testified in front of House Judiciary Committee’s Subcommittee on Immigration, Citizenship, Refugees, Border Security, and International Law. He spent one day with the UFW (United Farm Workers) to pick vegetables. This was enough to warrant his congressional testimony. Here are some of the highlights:
“Americans are far too dependent on immigrant labor to pick fruits and vegetables. The obvious answer is for all of us to stop eating fruits and vegetables.”
“Maybe this Ag jobs bill will help. I don’t know. Like most members of Congress, I haven’t read it.”
“Apparently, the invisible hand doesn’t want to pick beans.”
“We should genetically engineer vegetables to pick themselves.”
Responses to Questions:
Rep. Lamar Smith (R-TX): How many of the workers there with you were legal and how many of them were illegal?
“I don’t know. I didn’t ask them for their papers but I had a strong urge to.”
Do you know how much they were paid?
“I don’t know. I didn’t do a good enough job to get paid. They asked me to leave.”
Does one day of work in the field enough make you an expert witness?
“I believe one day of me studying anything makes me an expert.”
Here’s the link for his opening statement.